We are drawn to what makes us feel right. The stumbling block is that too often we do find ourselves caught up in the critical to such a degree we do lose sight of whom we glance upon in a mirror. So many times have I taken the chance morning or night and not really been entirely happy with what I see. There are of course ancient variables in play that effect the state of the human condition.
The energy to be gained from confidence is formidable indeed. We strive to be someone whom we believe worthy of life, and without, we are sometime in a constant battle with purpose, some completion of a standard we have seeming internalized and set for ourselves. It is no wonder then there are those times when we feel we have not reached our goals, we lack the energy or desire to bring ourselves over that edge to find the valley and stream of beauty beyond an obstacle.
So how do we find that crest? There are those that are of course able to find it on their own. And some, perhaps we, perhaps me, the observer often glance with envy at the beauty of finding oneself to such a degree that negativity might surround them and not ever pierce their bubble of confidence. We could, or at least go on with our lives believing there is some agate of beauty ahead of us. That is of course, if we are able to maintain some level of understanding that we have reason to move forward in our lives.
It is important in this moment to recognize we can or we may always ask for help. When we have reached a low where it appears there really is nowhere to turn, that is the time we must step forward and find a person, a passionate member of an empathetic audience of care and compassion. They exist and God help us if we cannot allow ourselves the vulnerability of needing a shoulder to cry on, a person of eyes to lose worry in because theirs contain a sea of wonder we could believe in, namely because they teach us how to believe in our own worthiness.
We live by a societal sword, a monogamous mandate. Certainly there are success stories, a couple whom together have given each other that banner of desire and love that allows them to go forward and live an extraordinary life together. I’m not referring to the envy I spoke of earlier, more the wonder of how soul mates respond to the adversity around them, to create this utopia of contribution and all the tools that allow their lives to explode with a wonderful fury of growth within one another’s support and again, purpose.
What about the others, where do we find our confidence? Perhaps the energy we seek is outside of ourselves and we must make a difficult decision to abandon that which we promised, and begin a challenge to justify our means. I must speak to the why, and that is because again that piece of confidence in our lives may include one who shares and encourages our ideals. Such is a rarity that must be given a place in kind memory.
When we do experience the delightful nature of happiness with someone of similar energy, a positivity that moves us to feeling heart and soul, we might hang on, but if we should not because our society does have rules of a sacramental nature, why then we must still try to be lovers of life, and allow ourselves to know there is truth in happiness and purpose in confidence.
Indeed, life can happen, eyes sparkle (together)in the light an eloquent love story.
© Scott F Savage 2019
apersonaljourney - stories of love 