I remember the first day, discovering a picture
that would step well into my childhood,
I had looked at it earnestly,
a fall afternoon,
the two of us in posture as children,
his the leather bomber jacket,
and me,
a sort of camel coat, endearing,
effeminate in relation to his own
though I didn’t know the meaning,
only my personal response.
I saw that picture within the time frame
before the snow fell,
it stayed with me,
defined me for the weeks ahead.
I could never decide whether I liked it or not,
certainly the memory together I will
always cherish,
the response from my own ego
as a nine year old,
causes my mind to wander,
and accept how that began my own
response
identity,
fear and perhaps
though again,
I couldn’t define the term,
agony of my departure
of confidence.
I wonder if today,
he would stand by my side,
and suggest,
cousin you are such the funny man,
there is unconditional love among idiots.
We would then laugh and go along our way.
© Scott F Savage 5/2020
the ‘b’ series
apersonaljourney - stories of love 