Sometimes the pain is so deep
I can’t breathe,
I want to crawl into
the darkest corner,
just escape,
somehow not feel
this vacant state of mind.
Seems nothing wants to fill my mood,
except decades of indecision,
always wanting,
never giving
and the realization is so painful.
I know what love is,
I’ve felt it,
and watched it go away.
Seems when in this state of mind,
takes forever to feel love again.
Maybe that is necessary
to appreciate truth again,
for it is something,
I so desperately need.